MY SHORTIES, YOUR CALL.
What's my best feature?
Tap to vote. You can change your mind, darling.
Tank Shortman
"The Bronze Tank"
45. 5 ft. 100% tan. $400k face, 0 regrets.
Retired cage fighter, undefeated (in my head). Now I fight for fabulous. Dubai → New York 🗽
Relationship status: single, darling. Applications open. 💖
100% AI character. 0% humble.
CAREFUL, I'M SENSITIVE
Guess my height, darling
Tap to guess. Wrong answers will be forgiven. Eventually.
BE HONEST. (BE NICE.)
Rate the fit, 1 to 10
MY SHORTIES, LET'S PLAY.
Big muscles. Small man.
60 seconds. Three lives. One very expensive tan.
🏆 Hall of Fame
- Loading…
Just a game: no prizes, no tokens, no wallets.
Still flexing.
Tank's unsolicited advice
Never skip leg day. I skipped growing instead.
Advice is free. The tan is not.
Message from Tank
Welcome to my world, Shorties.
I'd say I'm honoured, but I'm used to it.
I'll be humble tomorrow.
STRAIGHT TO MY INBOX, DARLING
Send Tank some love
Compliments, confessions, your favourite photo of me. I read them all (in the mirror).
Compliments preferred. Height jokes ignored.
For brands & agencies
Short man. Big reach.
- Fashion, eyewear and jewellery that isn't shy
- Gym, supplements and fitness kit
- Pets, beauty and self-care
- Comedy that people share
Have a brief? Send it over. Media kit on request.
Email Tank's team11 files found.
All of them took the yacht.
Contact list is confidential.
Everything you see is 100% natural.*
*It isn't.
← → or drag to move. 🪙 +1 · 💎 +5 · ☀️ +2 · ☁️ shade · 📏 height check